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Tomorrow is the Boston Marathon.  A place that I thought I would be visiting by now.  A few of my good friends are there preparing to meet their goal when they go to the starting line tomorrow–some for the first time, some not.  It’s bittersweet for me..I am so very happy for & proud of them, yet at the same time, sad that I am not with them.  I keep telling myself, it’s ok, you’ll have your shot, but I’m not so sure.  Somehow over the last year, I’ve lost my drive and determination.  I have almost reached every goal I set out to achieve…a sub 25:00 5k, finish a 1/2 marathon without walking, run a sub 2 hr 1/2 marathon, run a full-marathon by the age of 40 etc.  All goals I’m so very proud of & never thought in a million years I would have been able to do just 10 short years ago when I was busy raising 4 young children & anchoring myself into a successful nursing career.  The issue I’m facing now is that I can’t seem to get any faster or stronger & little things keep cropping up that hinder my training.  (unexplained vertigo, chronic insomnia, piriformis pain and now, possible gallbladder issues) it seems like it’s always something.  I spend alot of time and effort trying to make comebacks & prevent new issues from cropping up.  Maybe this is as good as it gets and I need to be happy with the fact that I can run…that I get to run, that I have a choice to run. I need to refocus and get myself back in this game if I want to continue to play it & ever see Boston & surround myself with positive people.

One thought on “Motivation

  1. Finally found your blog…I don't know why I couldn't find it before. And so glad that I did. I haven't read through much, but your last post really hits home for me.
    there are so many times that I had my doubts and wondered why I was doing what I was doing. and weather I would ever toe the line in boston.
    But, it is the journey and not the destination that makes the difference. As we grow older, to be able to keep ourselves as healthy as possible, to be strong, to be good role models for our families, to take risks by trying something that we really don't know if we can do.

    there are too many people out there just going through the motions, letting life pass them by.

    It sounds like you have come a LONG way as a runner, and there are huge things you should be very proud of, good luck as you continue your journey.


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